"Sand Dollars"

Published 15 June 2002

(word count: 750)

Atlas isn’t shrugging, he’s moving to Bermuda.

By opening PO box style corporate headquarters on Caribbean isles, American corporations can (gasp!) keep more of their profits.  Tyco International, for example, protected $400 million from the professional tax-grabbers.  As you might expect, this PO box maneuver has PO’d the professional tax-grabbers.

Republicans and Democrats have bleated almost comically stereotypical reactions.  Republicans naturally see these offshore operations as a moral issue.  Democrats predictably frame them in terms of class warfare.  Otherwise, both agree that the already morbidly obese federal government just can’t tolerate a single tax morsel escaping its treasury belly.

“These expatriations aren’t illegal, but they’re sure immoral,” harrumphs Iowa’s Republican Senator Charles Grassley.  “During a war on terrorism, coming out of a recession, everyone ought to be pulling together.”  (i.e., “you pulling out your wallets and we pulling out your money.”)  You can almost hear him paraphrasing the Bush-Cheney-Powell-Rumsfeld barbershop quartet, “If you move to Bermuda the terrorists will have won!”

Never mind that they’re moving (aka voting with their feet) to escape homegrown professional tax terrorists like Grassley.

And Democrats (here’s that familiar class warfare thing) are shocked, shocked, to discover that some executives might personally benefit from a Bermuda relocation.  How dare these American citizens benefit from their own efforts when everyone knows that it’s the professional tax-grabbers who are supposed to benefit from the efforts of American citizens.

Many in congress are demanding laws to keep the tax slaves from escaping.  Congressional Republicans are proposing a “temporary moratorium” on relocations.  (A modern incarnation of the antebellum Fugitive Slave Laws?)  Even after proposals like this, many libertarians still have Republican friends who actually believe the fairy tale that the Grand Old Party stands for smaller government and the free market.

Treasury Secretary Paul O’Neill looks askance at this stance.  “The overly complex US corporate tax code needs to be fixed.”  But libertarians are cautioned to ask, “Fixed how?”  Fixed to squeeze every possible penny from corporate profits?  Or fixed to allow companies and their investors to keep what they’ve earned, thereby returning Bermuda to vacationing status rather than a sanctuary for tax victims?

Arianna Huffington has a word for people who relocate in the name of legal tax avoidance: “Sleazy.”  (Full disclosure: years ago I moved from high-state-income-tax Minnesota to no-state-income-tax Texas.  That makes me a sleazeball.  Or is that slimebag?)

Although this is my first direct exposure to an Arianna Huffington column, she wastes no time in introducing me to her vision of a world wherein every Roosevelt dime earned by any American anywhere any time rightfully belongs to government, to be doled out to whomever they, or she, thinks should get it.

But Ms Arianna sees an even darker horror.  Not only do these companies escape taxes, they escape (gasp!) dictatorial political control.  These “sleazy” corporations are “immune to judgments against them in US courts, less accountable to their shareholders, who are unable to file class action suits, and freed from a whole host of annoying government regulations.”

But she seems not to have a similar concern for the fatted pig that is government.  If she had even the slimmest concept of freedom, she might have written something like this:  “These sleazy tax-grabbing politicians are immune to judgments against them in US courts, virtually unaccountable to their constituents, who are unable to file class action suits when they’re lied to, and freed from a whole host of annoying Constitutional regulations.”

Huffington is equally quixotic when addressing corporate-government relationships.  Expatriate companies that use the Caribbean “sleazy tax-cheating loophole” will also “think nothing of holding out their hand when Uncle Sam is shelling out government contracts.”  But who passed the “sleazy tax-cheating loophole” into law?  Whose money is being shelled out in those contracts?  Why doesn’t Huffington huff against “sleazy tax-grabbing Uncle Sam” who has utterly no justification in a free society to coercively redistribute other people’s money to anyone else, sleazy corporations or otherwise?

Libertarians have a solution to all of this that’s so breathtakingly simple it almost hurts: demand that our politicians obey the Constitution.  By abolishing the ninety to ninety-five percent of government that isn’t authorized by the Constitution we’d all have money to invest in options that might actually solve some of society’s problems through honest, voluntary interactions.

Immigrants have been coming to America for centuries to escape the tyranny of their homelands.  It's sad to see Americans fleeing America, if only in a fiscally technical sense, for much the same reasons.

- by Garry Reed